Truth is always something that is contained within a certain frame of reference. If I'm travelling in a car on the freeway, the car next to me may look like it's standing still. Is it? Some would say, "But it's not! It's driving 5kmh over the limit!".
Yet if my 9 month old son were to magically be able to speak and said "That car's not going anywhere." I'd agree with him. Because that statement speaks truthfully of our experience of it. It is true, within our frame of reference. It's a narrow frame of reference, but the statement is an entirely valid expression of the experience of someone from within it.
Which is what allows me to listen well. Well, better.
When I listen to someone, this allows me to listen actively and acknowledge their thoughts, experiences and feelings. I can honestly nod my head when listening to someone explain how a situation affected them, even when I might have a totally different understanding of that situation. I can truly hear that person, and allow them to feel heard and understood.
He who answers before listening--that is his folly and his shame. (Pro. 18:3)All too often I have in the past, and sometimes still do, fail to hear a person well because I'm too busy putting together my 'objective' take on the situation. We can all too easily invalidate a person's experience by helping them see it from another angle before we've acknowledged what it looked and felt like from their camera angle.
Our subjective experiences are real. Real to us. They are a truth, in that sense, however untrue they may be when a larger body of facts and broader perspective is available. Having someone sit with you in your experience and feeling what you're feeling is a powerful thing. Being understood is massively powerful.
A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion. (Pro. 18:2)In fact, often it is enough on its own to enable that person to evaluate their perspective and self-correct. And you've managed to do so without ever acting as if you've got the omniscience to know all truth as God knows it.
When I was younger, I'd baulk at nodding my head to indicate understanding if I disagreed with what the other person was saying. It was amazing how quickly my body language and posture towards them would make it clear that I was no longer with them, hearing them, understanding them and how quickly the other person would close up.
Understanding the appropriate subjectivity of truth allows me to acknowledge the other person's experience as their experience, and so to hear and understand them well without being scared of lying by nodding or saying 'right' as I listen. To acknowledge their experience is not to validate their interpretation of it.
Listening is a language of love. And it's only in love that the truth builds up.