See, the hardest thing, at least for semi-insecure young men, is the emotional toll that it takes on the mind, body and soul. Last night I was an absolute mess, worrying whether I'm ever going to be less pathetic than my current standard.
The emotional turmoil isn't made any easier by my inability to actually get 'into' the writing of a talk early enough that it's a genuinely polished article by the time it gets preached.
Oh well. One day I'll be happy with a talk that I do.
The evening talk was actually quite good, but the delivery in the morning was pretty rubbish, and we didn't read out the whole passage which had me second-guessing what I'd planned to say the whole time. I wasn't sure what I could assume my audience would know. Argh!
Preaching on big chunks is also difficult for a youngster, and when you feel like your main point is a tiny bit abstract, you can be sure there'll be those in your congregation who think it more so.
Ah well, good to vent. I'm ok though. Quite ok. God's good.